How to make sure you always come out a winner
Negotiation is a fact of life. To be successful you must remember that everything is negotiable. Many people find negotiation to be rather intimidating, thus shortchanging themselves, because they fail to engage in the process. Negotiating is viewed as a contest of wills in which power determines outcome, and the little guy doesn’t stand a chance. This may produce some short-term results – but it is a win-lose process. However, it does not have to be that way. Effective negotiation should result in meeting the needs of both sides while preserving the relationship.
Negotiating, in the fullest sense, involves the development of long-term relationships. Successful negotiations are based on respect, not hard-sell tactics. How we negotiate reflects our respect for the other party and our commitment to the life of that relationship. Good negotiators understand how to build key relationships, how to identify what others need, how to meet those needs and how to get what they want in return. Too often we receive bad advice about hard-core negotiating tactics, when in reality, those who are most successful at negotiating show a lot of style and grace under pressure – something their co-negotiators remember and appreciate.
In business, you’re often involved in one negotiation after another. We call it many different things–raising money, leasing space, selling, hiring, buying equipment–but regardless of the form negotiation takes, it is important to recognize the process for what it is. Otherwise you’ll miss opportunities to get better deals.
Try these principles to create win/win negotiations and improve the outcome of your next deal.
Be Prepared
Every negotiation requires preparation, planning, and practice–these can be the real keys to success. Do all necessary research, think of possible outcomes, rehearse what you will say and set goals. Have an agenda and stick to it as closely as possible. Always go into a negotiation well rested. Long negotiations can be exhausting, and the person with energy has the will to continue. Do everything in your power not to weaken your position by losing energy. Fatigue stops the positive thoughts necessary for good negotiations.
Know Your Bottom Line
Determine what you want before coming to the table. To get what you want, you’ve got to know what you want and be able to articulate your goals clearly. Before you sit down to negotiate, do yourself a huge favor. Make a wish list of what you must have, what you would like to have and what you can do without.
This is your road map, and it will give you more focus and power at the bargaining table.
Know Your Audience
Assess the person and people you’ll be negotiating with and adopt an appropriate communication style. Knowing the negotiation style of the person you are negotiating with can be critical to achieving a positive outcome for both. Know the authority of everyone involved in the negotiation. Make sure you know if you are negotiating with someone empowered to make the final decision.
Set Your Goals High Enough
No offer is too high provided you can present valid justifications that prove it meets the underlying needs of all parties. You can’t expect to make a deal without making concessions, so start high. The higher your aspirations are in the beginning, the more you will likely end up with at the closing of the negotiation. Ask for more than you expect, otherwise you may get less than you deserve.
Listen and Acknowledge
The role of a good negotiator is to listen to and understand what others are saying. As a listener, you are gathering information that is vital for understanding the needs and perspective of the other person. The better your understanding, the more flexibility and creativity you will have as you create options. After all, you can’t make an intelligent response to a need or objection you do not understand. It also shows respect and good intentions, and will make the other person feel valued. By listening and asking questions, you may discover a better deal than you ever thought was possible. One other benefit of listening is that the discipline to focus on other opinions can also give you the chance to reflect on the process and strategy, ultimately making you a more effective negotiator.
Avoid Emotions
Negotiation is just a game. However, it is a process that can deeply involve our egos and emotions. The more emotionally attached you become to a desired outcome, the harder you try to achieve it. Pretty soon you begin to lose perspective. It’s important to stay neutral. Separate the people from the issues to avoid personalizing them. Make sure each party understands the other’s perception of what is involved.
Be Prepared to Walk Away
Always be able to detach yourself from the situation and walk away. If you become too eager or desperate, it can be difficult to negotiate objectively. Control of the negotiation belongs to the party who is perceived to need the deal the least. When you care the least at the negotiating table, you have the most strength.
Negotiate in Good Faith
When you start negotiating, remind yourself that you want this agreement to work satisfactorily for everyone involved. It’s better to focus on how you can both win. The relationship that is established impacts the outcome of the negotiations. Always remember the needs of the other side throughout the process. Show compassion by listening for the real reason behind their objection or hesitation. Let them air their feelings, make comments, present objections and feel comfortable telling you whatever is on their minds. Then, and only then, will all parties come to the negotiating table in good faith.
Be Patient
Cultivate the use of a calculated hesitation. Once you make an offer, wait. The other party then has three choices – accept, reject or counteroffer. If you begin making concessions before they respond, you are doing their negotiating for them. All concessions teach the lesson that more concessions can be made on other issues. Hear them out on all their issues first. After that you can make concessions, but make sure your opponent takes some demands off the table as well.
Remember, there are no absolute rules in negotiation; every principle has an exception. The good news is that like anything else, negotiation gets easier as you do it. With practice, you will develop your own personal style and become comfortable with the process. Negotiating can be fun, empowering and enjoyable for both parties. It works only when all those involved feel as if they have won.